Dear Mom and Dad,
I am writing to thank you for a few things. Even though I am growing up now, in the “real” world, I have not forgotten the things you taught me when I was living under your roof, and many of those things are now useful to me, even though I swore I would never grow up and be “just like you”.
NOTE: This is just a partial list. I’ll never be able to count every good thing that you’ve taught me!
-Mom: Thank you for forcing me to do the entire family’s laundry for several years. My roommates did not take kindly to my attempts at throwing my clothes in with their loads in order to get them washed.
-Dad: Thank you for instilling in me an understanding, if not a love, of sports. I’ve learned that the most nerve-wracking situations in the workplace can be diffused by asking if anyone saw the game last night.
-Mom: Thank you for showing me how to use the stove and/or oven. This piercing hurt in my stomach won’t go away until I eat food, and knowing that I don’t have to travel to my friend’s houses to mooch food is a nice boost to the ego. I think they call that pain “hunger”, by the way. Funny, I never remember experiencing this when I lived with you.
-Dad: Thank you for teaching me what it means to be a man. In a world where boys stay that way their entire lives, and the media tries to turn the rest into feminine weaklings, you showed me that a man can be a man without being abusive, masochistic, or intellectually challenged.
-Mom: Thank you for not letting me date until I was…wait, did you ever let me date? It just…yeah, it saved me from a lot of problems and heartache. A LOT of problems and heartache.
-Dad: Thank you for teaching me that guns are awesome (but to be careful with them), war movies are awesome, cars are awesome, lighting things on fire is awesome, scars are awesome, explosions are awesome, cowboys are awesome, camping is awesome, and fireworks are awesome. I don’t think I ever would have learned any of those from Mom.
-Mom: Thank you for (mostly) keeping your words to yourself when Dad was teaching me these awesome things.
-Mom: Thank you for making me look respectable for church and other events. As it turns out, employers like it when you look respectable, too.
-Dad: Thank you for disciplining me. It has saved me a lot of money and time wasted on therapy and counseling that my peers are now having to endure, all because their parents weren’t willing to use the “rod of discipline” to knock the stupid out of them.
And last, but not least…
-Mom and Dad, thank for teaching me about Jesus. Thank you for demonstrating what God’s love is, every day of my life. Thank you for teaching me that families thrive when they are under God’s protection and love. Thank you for surrounding me with Christian friends, and a church congregation, that would be there beside me fighting the battles while we are here on earth.
Signed,
-Dear Son
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P.S. Yes, I cried.
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